The path to bioniciconic
I never thought I was different until “normal” people made me feel different. At the time it hurt. They hurt me. Now, I know if it wasn’t for them, bioniciconic wouldn’t be here.
I now get why normal people can be unpleasant - it’s the whole pack instinct thing, and reason enough to run as far away from “normal” as possible. But at the time, as I started secondary school I didn’t have the luxury of such wisdom.
Instead I experienced three years of constant taunts, threats and the odd bout of physical violence because as it turns out I was gay.
Of course it was the boys who did the bullying and the girls who stood up for me. Being naturally placid I didn’t fight back. Maybe I should have.
Instead, my way of coping was to close myself off from the real world, It didn’t matter what insult was thrown at me, because I’d created my own “perfect” world.
I was living a dream existence, and it was perfect in every detail. This meant developing every aspect of my alternative world, including the all the people and even their back stories. I even created the “virtual” environment to live in. After all if you’re going to create an imaginary life you may as well get all the details right!
I’m guessing a therapist could have a field day with this.
However, this was small town life in the early 1980s and I did what I needed to do to deal with the crap.
This whole experience allowed me to develop a deep passion for creativity. It takes a whole lot of imagination to construct a perfect world to escape to.
At the same time, I did get to hang out with the other “different” kids at school. No real surprise that they turned out to be the really interesting people. I’m thankful for this.
Today I don’t want to fit in with the crowd. Instead I delight in getting to know people from any background. This gives me a rich mix of friends who live many different lives and rarely tick the box marked “normal” (whatever that means).
I wish I’d felt this way all those years ago. Instead, I yearned to be accepted. On entering the adult world I tried too hard to fit in; of course a recipe for an unsatisfactory life if ever there was one.
I knew this wasn’t right but it just became a way of existing. However, there came a point when I realised I wasn’t happy. So that was it, I made the decision to live the life I wanted and my starting point was to get on an aeroplane. It sounds simple, but even this seemed like a challenge to me. It was 2014 and I headed to Copenhagen for five days, where I walked and walked and walked. I walked my spark back. My passion for creativity, design, art, fashion, architecture and most importantly people was rekindled.
This gave me a real itch that needed to be scratched. I’ve reached a place where I’m questioning and rejecting the “norm”. I’m challenging the way we live, I’m engaging with interesting people, and I finally know that I don’t want to follow the tried and tested path. I want to embrace the new, the interesting, the challenging and the creative.
Which is why at the start of 2016 I knew that being employed full time wasn’t good for me. So I quit my job, freed myself, and had a whole lot of fun. I couldn’t shake off the idea of creating something new that would embody everything I’d come to learn about myself, and the world around me.
So this is where bioniciconic comes in. A brand born of love, of hope, and of risk. With all my heart I hope it’s something that interesting and creative thinkers will enjoy being a part of too.